Since Al Capone murdered loads of people 86 years ago, we have annually celebrated this tragic event by exchanging romantic gifts for some reason. Nowhere is this nonsense more prevalent than on the minefield of vanity and one-upmanship that is social media. Valentine’s Day is one of those days when everyone feels the need to prove to their imaginary audience that their day is going great, regardless of whether they’re single, married, divorced, or whatever.
So here we go; here are the different types of statuses that you’ll be seeing throughout today.
So here we go; here are the different types of statuses that you’ll be seeing throughout today.
Image Credit: plentymore.files.wordpress.com
Below are some Facebook statuses you're likely to see on V-Day. For further clarification, I've put the real message of the statuses below the pictures, so you too can decode those heart plastered cries for help on your timeline.
I forgive you for cheating on me, so here’s loads of shit I got from Tesco yesterday.
Unjustifiably single and bitter.
Neither of us could afford gifts.
Please let my ex see this
I want to tell everyone how much my boyfriend spent on me this year but I don’t want to seem big-headed, so I’ll wait until someone asks me instead.
Update: as of 5 hours later, no one has asked.
Update: as of 5 hours later, no one has asked.
Check how much I hate Valentine’s Day, you guys!
Massive balls.
By Joe Turner
Joe is one of the many writers we have at Foul Entertainment and the author and deviser of Plenty Of Catfish. He is a main stay on the voice cast for Foul Fiction. He's also responsible for the bulk of the artistic design in our upcoming gaming department.
Joe is one of the many writers we have at Foul Entertainment and the author and deviser of Plenty Of Catfish. He is a main stay on the voice cast for Foul Fiction. He's also responsible for the bulk of the artistic design in our upcoming gaming department.