
Films
Honourable Mentions
- Sonic the Hedgehog 2 - It’s not that Sonic wasn’t irritating in the first movie (a movie that, lest we forget, made the top 10 in 2020 by virtue of being one of the 12 or so films that released that year), but I don’t feel he was this irritating. The entire cast are insufferable in this, with only Jim Carrey turning in anything worthwhile.
- Death of the Nile - I thought Murder on the Orient Express was a little dull, but this one is so boring I forgot it existed until I started writing this list.
- Morbius - This is the special kind of bad movie that is ALMOST unintentionally funny enough to work in a novel kind of way, much like last year’s Sony-Marvel offering Venom: Let There Be Carnage. But unfortunately the bland parts massively outweigh the aggressively dumb parts.
I just checked, and somehow Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald did not get named as my worst movie of 2018, which initially shocked me. How did a bad movie hall of fame entry lose out? Then I saw it was beaten out by The Shape of Water, another bad movie hall of fame entry.
So I guess this is one thing The Secrets of Dumbledore has going for it - it at least won something (sure wasn’t the box office)! And picking which is the worst of the two is a puzzle, and depends how you classify “bad”.
Grindlewald is a big, loud kind of failure. It definitely tried something, it’s just that it failed spectacularly. WB changed tactics seemingly with Dumbledore, instead aiming lower in their ambitions. So it is a much more comprehensible movie, but is also much blander and forgettable than it’s predecessor.
And it seems everyone else agreed as well, as it looks like this films biggest legacy will be “the film that tanked the Harry Potter spin-off series”. So many wonderful accolades!
I initially had this as an honourable mention. But that was this film being propped up by the franchise it belongs to. But if I’m going on how a movie made me feel, particularly fresh out the cinema, no amount of nostalgia for my favourite film ever can distract from the genuine sadness I felt walking out of Jurassic World: Dominion.
This is the movie I feared the original Jurassic World would be - a gaudy, smash-and-grab nostalgia bait cash in on the 1993 masterpiece. But JW turned out really well. And with Colin Tomorrow back in the director’s chair for this one, I was hopeful of a cap-off for the franchise that improved on the bang average JW: Fallen Kingdom.
Instead it is an almost laughably textbook smash-and-grab, notalgia bait cash in, so ham fisted even Scary Movie 5 would say “that was a little trite”.
It borders on parody, even when just written down. The central antagonists of this dinosaur movie, written as an end to a six-part series, are giant locusts. There’s a red-feathered raptor that scuba dives for some reason. Ian Malcolm cares more for remembering Miles Davies' birthday than saving a child.
I have spent the last 6 months trying to write a better version, but I recently gave up as I think there is no saving this premise. I wasn’t ready for the Jurassic Park franchise to go away, but if this is what we’re getting, I think it’s time we let it go extinction (for a bit).
The Rest
Some big name franchises find themselves in amongst the “also rans”. Two of Marvel’s three marquee films, namely Thor: Love and Thunder and Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness, both underwhelmed massively. DC similarly put out the very bland Black Adam, another attempt to course correct the DCEU that has gone on to bomb at the box office.
Animation also faltered, with no representation in the top 10. Lightyear has solid without shaking the feeling that it was necessary (go listen to Mike’s much better pitch for it). Turning Red tried something new and didn’t click, whilst Minions: The Rise of Gru tried something familiar and came out perfectly OK.
Uncharted was outdone by Sandra Bullock comedy vehicle The Lost City, so not a great start for the newly minted Playstation Studios. And streaming had a fairly consistent albeit safe year, with Enola Holmes 2 and Hocus Pocus 2 getting what they needed to do done, whereas Do Revenge was looking like a potential top 10 film until it completely loses its mind for the last 20 minutes.
Oh and also Avatar: The Way of Water. The billion dollar franchise that also leaves no trace in your memory.
The Best
Blurb - Dumb people do dumb things, only they’re older now.
Reasons - In “The Jackass Pick” slot, we find Jackass, and that feels right. Considering I thought this movie looked cursed following the first trailer, as it dawned on me that Johnny Knoxville and the gang aren’t spring chickens anymore, so can’t bounce back from being knocked down like they used to, a sense of fun energy and a smart injection of new blood helped this to being the funniest movie of the year.
Best Bit - The Silence of the Lambs
Blurb - Underappreciated Matilda has her cleverness ignored by her parents, and when forced to go to a prison like school, leads a revolt.
Reasons - I watched the on-stage version of the musical when it was the hot ticket a few years ago, and it didn’t click with me at all. But for some reason the transition to film has done wonders for it. It helps that the cinematographer went needlessly hard with the visuals, pulling out some gorgeous shots unbefitting of a Netflix-produced kids musical. Surprise of the year by a long shot.
Best Bit - Miss Trunchbull’s assault course ballad.
Blurb - A Year One Batman is starting to make a name for himself in Gotham, which as always leads to the real freaks trying to get his attention.
Reasons - Those who heard our review of The Batman may be shocked to see it ranked this high, especially as this wasn’t a weak year unlike the last two. But The Batman stuck around in my brain way longer than most on this list, and has grown in my estimation since seeing it. The core cast all turn in different takes on the well established characters, and although I wasn’t 100% on board with Paul Dano’s Riddler, it wasn’t enough to pull the whole film down.
Best Bit - It eventually gets overused, but the moment the new theme plays as Batman walks towards Penguin’s upside car is pretty unforgettable.
Blurb - How do you even begin to describe . . .
Reasons - This is one of those films that feels like it could fall apart at any moment, but just about sticks the landing. It reminds me most of those Mighty Boosh episodes that teeter on the edge of being too weird to be enjoyable, but manage to save themselves. Michelle Yeoh and Ke Huy Quan are excellent in this multiverse spanning fight against the end of the world. It throws so many things at you that it is genuinely hard to remember exactly what went on, so this is going on feeling rather than memory. But it certainly was unique in a year where most films, even the good ones, felt slightly samey.
Best Bit - For all the craziness, it was actually just the rock scene for me.
Blurb - The Weird Al parody of Al Yankovic’s life.
Reasons - Something seemed off when this was announced to be premiering on Roku, the free streaming service. But in hindsight it makes sense, as that means this film was free from the shackles of big hollywood, and more able to be as silly as it really wants to be. Daniel Radcliffe’s ultra-hardcore Al gets to bang Madona, kill Pablo Escobar, and get assassinated in 1985. God I’ve missed good parody movies.
Best Bit - Like a Surgeon
Blurb - From one musical great to another, Elvis is the warts and all retelling of the life of the King.
Reasons - Casting Tom Hanks as a bad guy is a bold movie, as was essentially making him the narrator of a movie he is not the lead of. But framing the ups and downs of Elvis through the lens of his manager, Hanks’ Colonel Tom, is a smart way to frame the headline character as a victim, making his downfall more palatable. It may be the same kind of sugar coating and revisionist history many other musical biopics are accused of, but here it just takes the edge off a still razor sharp portrayal of the evils of success.
Best Bit - The comeback special.
Blurb - Young meets old when Ryan Reynold’s Adam travels back in time, and mistakenly bumps into his 12 year old self.
Reasons - While the film still has laughs throughout, it was nice to see an honest-to-goodness sci-fi that doesn’t have to be a comedy first. The stacked cast all deliver, and good action is peppered throughout a really tight story. It’s the equivalent of gourmet snack food - nothing to be taken too seriously, but a good time while it lasts.
Best Bit - Lightsabers!
Blurb - After nearly dying, Maverick is sent back to the Top Gun academy to teach the next generation of fighter pilots, ahead of an impossible mission.
Reasons - This ranking is partly based on the fact I no longer need to watch the trailer to Top Gun: Maverick ahead of every movie, as I had been doing since 2019. Lord knows it isn’t because of its deep, intricate story. No, this movie is dumb action operating on the highest level possible. The characters are all puddle deep, but somehow you still care about them and the success of the spectacular final mission.
Best Bit - Rooster’s rescue.
Blurb - Dealing with the unexpected death of T’Challa, the rest of Wakanda now has to deal with the arrival of another tribe blessed by the gift of vibranium.
Reasons - There’s a bit of a theme in this year's top 10 of movies that looked initially to be on shaky ground, but pulled it all together in the end. None more so than Wakanda Forever. The tragic death of Chadwick Boseman seemed a burden no movie, no matter how well-intentioned, could cope with. And yet, Wakanda Forever takes that heartache and makes it the central theme of the film.
This is a movie about grief, that takes its time to let its characters go through all the stages of mourning. Every actor, no doubt still dealing with their own real feelings of grief, gives it their all to honour the legacy of their former castmate. In fact, the only thing keeping it off top spot is the occasional trappings of a Marvel movie it has to deal with. That aside, it is comfortably the best film of the otherwise flawed Phase 4 of the MCU.
Best Bit - The opening procession.
Blurb - Several assassins find themselves in Japan, all stuck together on a high speed train.
Reasons - There’s something so special about movies like Bullet Train, that seem so simple and yet work so well because of how efficient they are. There isn’t an ounce of fat on this action comedy, with everything working in tandem to deliver laughs, heart and action scene after scene. Wakanda Forever certain has more going on under the hood, but ultimately Bullet Train wins out because it doesn’t have a true achilles heel - instead it just gives you exactly what you want from bell to bell.
Best Bit - When you realise that Thomas the Tank Engine is a core plot device.
TV
Thankfully, I avoided a lot of trash TV this year. Even Tekken: Bloodline has its moments. But it is super strange that no one can seem to crack the code of translating this wacky, over-the-top melodrama from video games to any other medium. The franchise went with animation here following the awful live action 2009 film (which I have only just found out had a sequel), largely sticking to the events of Tekken 3. But it’s a soulless, empty affair, which seems to want to reframe the action as a serious martial arts journey for Jin, instead of a crazy fighting tournament with bears, robots and alien ninjas.
At least King wins a lot.
The Rest
It was another steady year for Star Wars and Marvel over on Disney+, putting out multiple shows that settled into a happy 3 out of 5 groove. Obi Wan Kenobi got there in the end, but didn’t seem to want to milk the premise for all it was worth, whereas Andor was the real puzzle of the year, with a series that is exactly what I wanted out of the Rogue One prequel, but undoubtedly missing something. On the Marvel end, it was more straightforward, as both Ms Marvel and She-Hulk were just fine, in keeping with the average quality of Phase 4.
As one family drama came to the end, with This Is Us wrapping up with a super emotional season 6, another (kind of) returned, with Game of Thrones spin-off House of the Dragon landing on HBO. It seemed destined for the spin-off scrap heap early on, as the show struggled to find anything interesting to do with the rather dull Targaryen dynasty, but it did pick up near the end.
Special mention to What We Do In The Shadows, which can consider itself the #6 of this list. Season 4 wasn’t a home run like Season 3, but it did once again have a contender for best episode of the year in “Go Flip Yourself”.
Blurb - Finally finding a way to level the playing field against the supes, The Boys start to find out that having super powers isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.
Reasons - The nice thing about the big streaming series from this year is that they all felt like they were approaching an ending. It has often been the downfall of popular Netflix and Prime series - the concepts are either run into the ground, or cancelled prematurely. The Boys in particular does seem to have put a timer on things, which is a good sign for a show that keeps trying to top itself with the level of violence every year. Giving the gang powers (albeit with consequences) felt like the progress we needed, and things are left in a very interesting place.
Best Bit - Herogasm
Blurb - Surviving the end of Suicide Squad through . . . being John Cena, Peacemaker is given another chance to make amends as part of a shoddy shadow team trying to stop aliens invading.
Reasons - John Cena’s post-wrestling glow up continues, as he absolutely shines in this mental action-comedy-sci-if. The rest of the cast are great too, with Freddie Stroma’s Vigilante stealing most scenes he’s in. The future of DC is finally looking bright with James Gunn at the helm.
Best Bit - Batman rant.
Blurb - Now back in the present, just not their present, the Academy has to deal with their replacements.
Reasons - Every year, Umbrella Academy reinvents itself. It could coast on the strength of its cast and their off the charts chemistry, but instead it finds ways to put them in interesting new predicaments. I do feel there is a limit to this though, so I am reluctantly thankful that season 4 will seemingly be the end, but if that works as well as the 3 previous series, this is an all-timer TV show.
Best Bit - Bachelor party.
Blurb - The teenage years really rear their ugly head as the kids from Hawkins adjust to the new status quo, with Eleven and Will out west, Max grieving and Hopper missing.
Reasons - This is barely a TV show at this point. The finale took place over two feature length episodes, so season 5 may just be a movie a week. But I don’t think anything else could sustain that level of commitment, as Stranger Things roared back into the mainstream on the back of an expansive, globe trotting adventure that still sacrificed none of its heart.
Best Bit - Master of Puppets
Blurb - Man with suspicious cockney accent Steven Grant is convinced he is going mad, and well, he is. With powers!
Reasons - For all of the misgivings about quality control and oversaturation, this is now back to back years of an MCU Disney+ show taking home the gold. And much like WandaVision, Moon Knight works because it is so unlike anything else in the MCU so far.
It does a remarkable balancing act between psychological thriller and high-concept superhero show. Oscar Issac pulls out all the stops playing the many roles that he does, but Ethan Hawke and May Calamawy are right up there with him. It is the first MCU property to feel elevated by its complete lack of connection to the wider universe, but lays the groundwork for really interesting things to happen when other heroes start to play in this world.
Best Bit - Hippo screams.
Video Games
Blurb - Pokémon goes open world as Gen 9 welcomes us all to the Paldea region.
Reasons - It took me a little while to click with the latest Pokémon game. For years we’ve called for an open world approach to this 25 year old franchise, but now we have it, I found in some ways it’s an odd fit. Without the linear approach, I was severely underleveled for most of the game. But after about the midway point, things fell into place for me, and although I maintain this is a lesser entry in the franchise (with possibly the weakest set of new ‘Mon ever), it’s still delivers where it matters.
Best Bit - Robot-mom and the time paradox.
Blurb - It’s Star Wars, in all its bricky goodness.
Reasons - This much delayed reinvention of the LEGO game formula really did deliver what it promised. It is astonishing how much bigger this feels, with a whole galaxy worth of planets to explore on top of the usual stand-alone levels. All that, without sacrificing much of the tropes we’ve come to enjoy. It feels like the ultimate celebration of Star Wars, and has me very excited for what gets the LEGO treatment next.
Best Bit - Free roaming as General Grevious, merchant of death.
Blurb - Nintendo spoils us with two mainline Pokémon games in the same year, this time throwing us back in time to create the very first Pokédex.
Reasons - Who knew this experimental, proof-of-concept would end up outshining Scarlet and Violet? Forgoing the true open world and instead focusing on biomes, PLA gets more out of less. The world of Hisui feels so lived-in, and tells perhaps the most well-balanced story the franchise has seen in years. It cuts all fat from the tried and tested Pokémon formula to make a game that feels, above all else, fluid. More of this please!
Best Bit - Hello, I’m God, here’s my number.
Blurb - Despite the advances made in Zero Dawn, Aloy still finds her world on the brink of collapse, as she heads west to find the root of the corruption spreading across the land.
Reasons - More robot dinosaurs.
But also more of the stellar world building that the first game had in droves. The narrative is less focussed here, as missions send Aloy away from her personal journey and towards several other problems all at once, but the gameplay is as deep as before, the world is a joy to explore, and the overall story certainly feels like it has a lot of momentum (especially after the WILD revelation at the end!).
Best Bit - Robot-pterodactyl surfing.
Blurb - The end of the world approaches, and try as they might, Kratos and Arteus can’t outrun it forever.
Reasons - It is hard to think of a more complete game. One that achieves absolutely everything it sets out to do, and it was trying to achieve quite a lot.
The story is so engaging, as several characters take turns on centre stage during its 40 hour run time. As with Horizon: Forbidden West, it isn’t as laser-focussed as 2018’s entry, but when I look back at everything it managed to cover in one game, it’s astounding.
Combat is again super rewarding. There’s customisation galore, allowing you to choose between several different fighting preferences. The side content is excellently paced and equally as rewarding. All this, and it looks unbelievably good.
It’s a masterpiece, and although our time in Norse mythology is done, I’d be ready tomorrow to jump into whatever comes next.
Best Bit - The last hour, as war comes to Asgard.
Wrestling
A Wall Street Journal exposé revealed that McMahon was allegedly under internal investigation for money used in court settlements, pertaining to several sexual misconduct cases. Within weeks, McMahon stepped down as chairman, before retiring and handing the reins over to his daughter Stephanie McMahon. I was on holiday when this news dropped, and the only way I could explain my massive reaction was to say this was the “normal person” equivalent of getting the news the Queen had died. Little did I know how useful that comparison would be . . .
This has led to a resurgence in WWE interest and quality, as Vince’s son-in-law Triple H finally got to take control of the main weekly TV shows, and he has roared back following a year plus of rival promotion AEW garnering non-stop praise whilst WWE laboured. Meanwhile, AEW hit the skids at around the same time as this happening (more on that below), but if nothing else we are now set for 2023 to be a very big year for wrestling - just hopefully more on-screen than off.
Anyway, in lieu of matches of the year, here are some of the people of the year that deserve mention as we wrap this article up.
Even in a year when he wasn’t the focus of AEW programming, The American Dragon is still out there proving he is the best in the world. He started off the year with a fantastic AEW title match against Adam Page (Page’s best match as champion) before diving into a year-long feud with the Jericho Appreciation Society.
Billed as a philosophical clash between “sports entertainment”, embodied by the JAS, and “professional wrestling”, championed by Danielson and the rest of his Blackpool Combat Club stable, the feud ultimately became unsettled by other events in the company forcing constant changes to the narrative. But even if the story didn’t have a satisfying conclusion, it still allowed Danielson plenty of chances to show off, with stellar matches against Daniel Garcia, Chris Jericho and Jon Moxley.
Match recommendation: Bryan Danielson vs. Daniel Garcia in a 2 out of 3 Falls match, AEW Dynamite, 17th August
There may never be a more stark difference between two halves of a wrestler’s year than CM Punk’s 2022. For most of the first 6 months, he was in feud of the year with young upstart MJF, telling a deeply personal story that culminated in a match of the year contender at AEW’s Revolution in March. Punk came out to his old ROH music, looking like a man reborn in probably my favourite “moment” of the year. He then went on to claim the AEW title at the next PPV, May’s Double or Nothing, dethroning Adam Page.
However, then he got injured shortly after, and the latter 6 months were a polar opposite. Clearly frustrated at being injured as champion, he returned to face the interim champion Jon Moxley at September’s All Out show in his hometown of Chicago. But in the weeks leading up, you could tell something wasn’t right. Punk has a long history of being grumpy, sometimes justifiably, and it was plain to see the spark in his eyes had gone. Then following the All Out match (which he won but once again got injured), he went on a post-match press junket.
You and me don’t have the time to go over all the frustrations, but there were a lot, and Punk let them all out, going off script to trash both the company, some of his fellow wrestlers, and the wrestling press. This led to some of those wrestlers confronting him immediately afterwards, which led to an incident labelled colloquially as “Brawl Out”. The fight led to all parties being suspended, and all signs point to Punk being done with the company. For most, it is amazing the speed at which this went downhill, but to Punk’s long term fans, it’s sadly not all that shocking.
MJF on the other hand had his own rollercoaster. He followed up his Punk feud with one against his former bodyguard Wardlow. They were set to face each other at Double or Nothing, but when real-life issues over pay caused MJF to threaten to walk out, the match saw its length cut to essentially a minute long squash match for Wardlow. MJF then disappeared from TV, save a “blurring the lines” promo on the following Dynamite where he too went off about his frustrations, only to return at All Out to win a ladder match and book himself a title match.
This was supposed to be against Punk, reigniting their feud, but Punk’s injury, suspension and stripping of the title led to him instead facing Jon Moxley for the belt at the last PPV of the year, Full Gear. MJF won, and after a turbulent year at the top of the card, I just hope AEW can now build an exciting top division around their young stud champion.
Match recommendation: CM Punk vs. MJF in a Dog Collar match, AEW Revolution, 6th March
The lads involved in the “Brawl Out” incident with Punk were The Elite, a team composed of Kenny Omega, Nick Jackson and Matt Jackson (the brother tag team known as the Young Bucks). They are co-founders of AEW, and had on the All Out show been crowned the inaugural Trios Tag Team Champions. But after Punk called them out for acting like “children”, they all wound up in a fight with Punk and his manager Ace Steel, who allegedly bit Omega. The trio were suspended, and stripped of their newly won gold.
But wouldn’t you know, the three men partially responsible for founding the company were found to be the innocent party after the investigation concluded! That was lucky! Jokes aside, their return at Full Gear did seem like a big deal, feeling like mega stars as they entered to “Carry On Wayward Son” by Kansas to face the men who won their vacated belts, Death Triangle, comprised of luchador brothers Rey Fenix and Penta, and mad Georgie bastard Pac.
Everyone expected The Elite to win to get “back on course” with the plan for the division, but unexpectedly, Death Triangle picked up the win when Rey Fenix let the darkness in and cheated to win. This has now led to an excellent Best of Seven series between the teams that has played out over the last few weeks of TV. Every match has delivered in a big way, so if you want a set of matches that require no context to enjoy, do follow this entire series, as it is flippy wrestling at its peak.
Match Recommendation: The Elite vs. Death Triangle, AEW Full Gear, 19th November
So, even though I mentioned that WWE has been on a hot streak since the summer, how come I haven’t mentioned them yet? Well, in all honesty, I’ve still yet to really get into the product. NXT is showing the green shoots of recovery following the dropping of the “2.0” rebranding from last year, but not enough to get me resubscribing to the WWE Network. I’ve caught a few shows here and there, such as the UK’s first PPV since 1992 at Cardiff’s Clash at the Castle, featuring a barn burner between perennial Foul Ent end of year favourite Walter (or “Gunther” as he has now been renamed) and Sheamus. And I’m watching every YouTube clip going of the returning Bray Wyatt. But thankfully the only thing I care about in WWE can be watched entirely through short clips on YouTube - the Sami Zayn saga.
The man who is just waiting for Bryan Danielson to retire again to become my favourite active wrestler, Sami Zayn was much like CM Punk in having two very different halves to his year, albeit in a much more positive manner. From January until WrestleMania in April, he was actually feuding with Johnny Knoxville and the Jackass crew. This culminated in what essentially was Jackass 4.25 at WrestleMania, where Zayn was hit by everything in the woodshed by the whole cast of Jackass, including the giant hand, before being trapped in a giant mousetrap and pinned by Knoxville. They may sound bad, but it was legit one of the matches of the year. PEAK wrestling comedy.
And then the mad bastard decided to infiltrate The Bloodline, the super-serious heel faction run by WWE champion Roman Reigns. Zayn basically wormed his way in initially by saying he saw the conspiracy theory working against Roman, one he too believed he was a victim of. Roman used Zayn’s desperation to feel like a part of something and made him cannon fodder. But Zayn was so eager to belong that he kept coming back, much to the chagrin of Jey Uso, Roman’s cousin and hardline believer in “the family”. Zayn was an outsider, and not to be trusted.
But over the last few months of the year, it has been amazing to see how Zayn, through sheer character work, has managed to get himself massively over with the fans, somehow becoming the most over babyface in the company despite being in the biggest heel faction. His genuine friendship with Jey’s brother Jimmy. Roman’s occasional moments of kindness. The fact that Sami keeps legit making everyone laugh on camera (despite their attempts to hide it). It’s a wonderful story, that in recent weeks has somehow got even better with the addition of Zayn’s long time best friend Kevin Owens, who is attempting to make Zayn see the inevitable betrayal waiting for him in the future.
It’s the best thing in wrestling, and although I know deep down Roman is destined to face his other cousin, The Rock, at WrestleMania in April 2023, I’m holding out hope that my boy Sami is the man to finally bring his 2+ year reign as champion to an end - because good God has he earned it.
Match recommendation: The Bloodline vs. The Brawling Brutes, Drew McIntyre and Kevin Owens in War Games, Survivor Series, 26th November