This article is a part of FoulENT's 30 Days of Stuff! Click here to read all 30 Days entries and be sure to come back every day in May for new stuff just like this!
Will Smith came to my house recently and dutily informed me about the lack of diversity across all major creative arts. I didn’t ask for his opinion but sure enough he gave it to me anyway. When I pointed out his inherently racist logic, he carried on blabbing his spiel until I punched him in his stupid head and banged his wife. Will Smith is an asshole.
Will Smith came to my house recently and dutily informed me about the lack of diversity across all major creative arts. I didn’t ask for his opinion but sure enough he gave it to me anyway. When I pointed out his inherently racist logic, he carried on blabbing his spiel until I punched him in his stupid head and banged his wife. Will Smith is an asshole.
It’s no secret that Will Smith was a rapper before he became the only black actor on the planet. I found some of his old rap videos and was not in any way surprised to find that I could barely distinguish between Will Smith rap videos and any other rap artist’s videos. The lack of diversity across my YouTube related videos list was staggering, as was the hypocrisy of Will Smith’s preaching before I punched him.
In my research, I came across a plethora of rap videos which were so similar even Michael Bay would struggle to create something less original. Below are some strange similarities I noticed during my trip to this world of outrageous claims, ridiculous stage names, and recurring bankrupty.
Rick Ross / The Macho Man
During my rap marathon, I found it difficult to distinguish between ex-professional wrestler The Macho Man’s campy, short-lived, mockable rap career, and famed hip-hop legend Rick Ross’ actual career. Looks-wise, one is an incredibly large, chain-wearing, gruffly-voiced, overblown-persona maniac, and the other is a former WWF superstar who once made his entrance to the wrestling ring on horseback.
Missy Elliot / Afroman
Irrelevant rap nobody Afroman and hip-hop megastar Missy Elliot have very little in common besides sort of looking like each other. While Missy Elliot is a household name in the rap world who boasts a successful 25-year strong career, Afroman is a woman-beating one-trick pony who sings exclusively about getting high. The point where these two artists overlap is their catalogue of stupid album titles. Missy Elliot’s discography reads like it was written by a 13 year old Cypress Hill superfan and Afroman’s back catalogue is a bunch of euphemisms for getting your James on.
Dr Dre / Chris Brown
Looking similar isn’t the only thing these two rap megastars have in common. Both of these rappers are huge advocators of Beats, but not the headphones kind. As we’ve already touched upon previously with Afroman, rappers have an intrinsic love of beating the shit out of women. Chris Brown is notoriously famous for beating up one woman, whereas Dre has gone one further and beat the shit out of at least three.
Violent Jay / A Lil' Kim Album Cover
What can be said about the Insane Clown Posse that hasn't already been said by everybody on the internet? Famous for once trying to sue the FBI and not understanding how magnets work, they're an easy target for anyone trying to get a quick laugh. However, say what you want about them, they are platinum album-sellingly successful, which is more than what most pandas have and will ever achieve.
By Joe Turner
Joe is one of the many writers we have at Foul Entertainment, known for Plenty Of Catfish. He is a main stay on the voice cast for Disagreevances. He's also responsible for the artistic design in our games.
Joe is one of the many writers we have at Foul Entertainment, known for Plenty Of Catfish. He is a main stay on the voice cast for Disagreevances. He's also responsible for the artistic design in our games.