This article is a part of FoulENT's 30 Days of Stuff! Click here to read all 30 Days entries and be sure to come back every day in November for new stuff just like this!
I've spent a lot of my life having sex with women. I'm 37 now, that's a solid 31 years of shagging under my belt. In this time I've managed to fine tune how I rate the attractiveness of a woman, and thus whether I would be willing to create the beast with two backs with her. So finally after almost 52 years of waiting is the Jary Rating System fully explained.
I've spent a lot of my life having sex with women. I'm 37 now, that's a solid 31 years of shagging under my belt. In this time I've managed to fine tune how I rate the attractiveness of a woman, and thus whether I would be willing to create the beast with two backs with her. So finally after almost 52 years of waiting is the Jary Rating System fully explained.
10/10
The top dog. Best in class. Cream of the crop. Here we have the top rating available in the Jary system. It's relatively simple, the breasts need to be at least 4 cup sizes bigger than the stomach. So if we have a woman whose stomach stick out to where a D cup would be then she has to be packing some Gs or she is an 8 at best. She has to have all of her teeth, and she needs to have both eyes, looking the right way. She has to be in possession of all of her limbs and extremities. She needs to speak enough English to be able to give consent. Any girl that achieves all of that, gets a definite would shag from Jary.
9/10
A 9 is still an incredibly high grade, so the requirements are still going to be pretty high. 3 cup sizes this time! Everything else remains the same. Any girl that achieves all of that, gets a definite would shag from Jary.
8/10
An 8 is the limit of what most men can achieve. She needs to have a rack that is bigger than her stomach, all of her teeth, limbs and extremities and be able to give consent. Any girl that achieves all of that, gets a definite would shag from Jary.
7/10
A 7 is where we start hitting flaw territory. A 7 needs to have a rack, arms, 95% of her teeth and be able to give consent. She is also allowed one flaw from the flaw list at the end of this article. Any girl that achieves all of that, gets a definite would shag from Jary.
6/10
A 6 needs to have a rack and arms. The ability to give consent is also a requirement. Two flaws off the flaw list. This is when you are getting into what is known as the sweet zone. The previous women all think they are 10s, even though only some of them actually are. The women from here down all know they are not 10s. They all know they are imperfect, and thus they are more likely to be up for a game of Canadian ping pong and with a fuck of a lot less effort. If you are really lucky you can nab a 6 who thinks they are a 3. Then you know you are guaranteed a roll around in the fart sack, and with a bird you wouldn't hide underneath your shopping when your Mom visits unexpectedly. Any girl who achieves all of that, gets a definite would shag from Jary.
5/10
A 5 needs to have tits that aren't deformed. She needs at least one arm that isn't deformed and she needs to be able to give consent. Three flaws allowed. Any girl who achieves all of that, gets a definite would shag from Jary.
4/10
A 4 needs to have tits. She needs to have at least one arm with a servicable hand and she needs to be able to give consent. Four flaws are allowed. Any girl who achieves all of that, gets a definite would shag from Jary.
3/10
A 3 needs at least one tit. She needs to have at least one stump. She needs to be able to give consent. Five flaws are allowed. Any girl who achieves all of that, gets a definite would shag from Jary.
2/10
A 2 needs to have nipples. She needs to be able to give consent. Six flaws are allowed. Any girl who achieves all of that, gets a definite would shag from Jary.
1/10
A 1 needs to be able to give consent. All flaws are not just allowed but guaranteed. Any girl who achieves all of that, gets a definite would shag from Jary.
The list of flaws
This list is not exhaustive, there are plenty more flaws out there for me to discover and/or remember. These are just the ones I can remember about the bird I am fucking while I am writing this.
- Bad breath
- Crazy
- Angry ex boyfriend
- Angry current boyfriend
- Angry husband
- Angry girlfriend
- Ugly
- Really fucking ugly
- Warts
- STIs
- Massive fanny
- Webbed toes
- Being named Kate
By Jary
@JaryFoulFantasy
Jary is one of the stars of Foul Fantasy. When he's not shagging someone who is almost definitely your mum, he's answering your love life questions and solving your romantic quandaries.
@JaryFoulFantasy
Jary is one of the stars of Foul Fantasy. When he's not shagging someone who is almost definitely your mum, he's answering your love life questions and solving your romantic quandaries.