I have a question: Why do non-entities have so much influence?
One day last week I woke up and like every morning I checked the news. By news I mean I looked at what was trending on Twitter and what Fat Johnnie was talking about on Facebook. It didn't take me long to stumble across yet more utter bollocks. All I ever seem to see these day is fawning, ridiculous bullshit about celebrities.
One day last week I woke up and like every morning I checked the news. By news I mean I looked at what was trending on Twitter and what Fat Johnnie was talking about on Facebook. It didn't take me long to stumble across yet more utter bollocks. All I ever seem to see these day is fawning, ridiculous bullshit about celebrities.
You don't need to know a specific story, it could be any day, there is always something there about fucking celebrities. It's the world we live in. So, without further ado, these are the five most pointless, vapid wastes of your time.
5 - Kim Kardashian's Husband
Image Credit: weheartit.com
This guy proclaims he's the greatest living rock star. It is factually incorrect for quite a few reasons. For starters, he's a rapper. So, he's not a rock star. Let's get one thing straight, I'm not well versed enough in rap to be able to comment on his ability as a rapologist. But he's fucking shit and not the greatest living rapper either. He's not even the greatest living person in his marriage. It says something about his efforts to be in the news that being fifth on this list will probably drive him to write a lyric about me, which I am reliably informed is called spitting bars these days.
4 - Kim Kardashian
Image Credit: deccanchronicle.com
That's the thing, isn't it? It doesn't matter what that silly golf ball headed twat does, his equally irrelevant wife will always be more famous and fill more column inches than him, and she has probably had more black cock than he's got too. This is a woman whose only achievement in life is releasing a really poor sex tape. Well, unless you count being married to the world's greatest living rock star. Oh, and naming her child after a fucking compass.
3 - Khloe Kardashian
Image Credit: dailymail.co.uk
Khloe Kardashian; One third of the Kardashian trio of leg opening publicity hungry bastards, and quite obviously the least relevant. This is a woman whose name I know, and that is it. The only thing she has ever done of note is... erm well her sister once released a sex tape and she is married to the world's greatest living rock star. I don't understand how someone with such a small amount of talent and charisma can continue to live life at the forefront of peoples thoughts, yet still be completely unrecognisable to the common person. Maybe that is her skill, being famous, yet still a complete and utter fucking nobody.
2 - Caitlin Jenner
Image Credit: abc.com
I have no problem with Bruce turning to Caitlin. If she feels that she is a woman then more power to her. What I have a problem with is the outpouring of back slapping that is going on. As though this is the bravest thing that has ever happened in the world. It happens every single day, to people in much worse situations that old Brucey was. Is her change of sex as brave as the woman who had to save for ten years for the op and got constant beatings in the street? Fuck no. Is it as brave as emergency service workers? Like firemen going into burning buildings to rescue someone? Fuck no. Fuck this fame hungry lifestyle. Accepting that bravery award was her final foray into true womanhood, because she managed to make everything fucking about her. Cunt.
1 - The Mother, whose name I can't rememeber
Image Credit: ]hollywoodlife.com
She could be either one of these utter states, but she's apparently in that photo. She is another one who I don't know anything about, but she is on the list by default. Purely because she gave birth to that cavalcade of below average fuckwits. If I was her and my children were such pointless wastes of my dick, I would cut it off and change my name to Caitlin.
By The Cunt
Email The Cunt
A hidden face of the crew, The Cunt is main coder for Foul Entertainment games. He is currently documenting the progress of our game, Foul Fantasy, in his dev blogs.
Email The Cunt
A hidden face of the crew, The Cunt is main coder for Foul Entertainment games. He is currently documenting the progress of our game, Foul Fantasy, in his dev blogs.