Or maybe I spoke too soon.
#4 - Shit Cover Songs
Sweet Dreams by Marilyn Manson, Rasputin by Turisas, this incredible version of The Catalyst by Pendulum. These are how cover songs should be done. The bands covering them have put their own stamp on the song and made it into something completely different or better. There’s no point playing someone else’s song note for note because people may as well listen to the original.
Enter the mainstream music industry, when covering someone else’s material is easy money. Bullshit artists like these punchable faced cunts will throw out a cover song without giving a second thoughts to such important things as the original lyrical content being about stalking thus making it kinda creepy when sung by five guys.
#3 - Found Footage Movies
‘Hooray’, you might be saying, but what about all the other similar types of movies which are clogging up our collective Netflix Recommended lists? Well, it should be noted that not all Found Footage movies are rubbish. Infact, there are some really awesome ones. The Poughkeepsie Tapes is my personal favourite, along with Lake Mungo and Megan Is Missing, but these films serve the point of films. They tell a story through a gimmick narrative which is perfectly designed for such a story. A point which has been noticeably missed by walking dollar signs sitting in Hollywood offices
Remember; different doesn’t always mean good
#2 - Selfies
In-character banter? Yes. Genuine grievance? Yeah, I reckon.
Selfies have become a staple in our collective culture. The compulsion to take a picture of ourselves in any situation has become normal. I personally remember when they were called ‘selfshots’ and were used exclusively in porn but those days are gone. Now, it’s perfectly normal to want to take a picture of an awesome moment and that’s fine. But my Facebook feed is regularly inundated with bullshit pictures of people’s faces, usually 5-10 at a time all in very similar poses. Now I have two questions; who cares and why?
The past few years I’ve noticed that my closest friends very rarely, if ever, post such bullshit on their social media accounts. I’m not being biased, but my friends are the most interesting people I know. They have fully-formed personalities and are completely comfortable with who they are. They have their own interests and feel no need to share them with an imaginary audience. They need no justification from people who they hardly know. But people in my life who I just sort of ‘know’ seem to be the people who post endless photos of themselves. I know I joke about such things, but it’s possible that such people could be omitting signs of Body Dysmorphic Disorder, incredibly low self esteem, or just plain wanting to kill yourself.
#1 - Zombies
Even the guy who invented the god damn genre is tired of their bullshit, and in 2012 I had the privilege of speaking to the horror legend Rob Zombie at one of his UK shows and he told me that his new film (at the time it was Lords of Salem) was going to be a psychological horror, because he was so sick of bullshit zombie and vampire films. This is a man who has the word zombie in his fucking name and even he’s had enough of their shit. The biggest culprit of overusing zombies comes from the gaming world, and shows no sign of slowing down with at least another seven massive zombie games coming this year.
Oh at well. At least literature still has some merit.
Joe is one of the many writers we have at Foul Entertainment and the author and deviser of Plenty Of Catfish. He is a main player on Disagreevances. He's also responsible for the bulk of the artistic design in our upcoming gaming department.