Magic is the strangest of all the performance arts. A ballet dancer will spend years rehearsing moves intending for their audience to see every last perfectly-choreographed twist. A magician will do the opposite. They will spend years perfecting a move, fully intending for no one to ever see it happen. They are practicing the art of appearing normal whilst underhandedly moving an object from one place to another or pulling out their cock without anyone seeing.
Below are four examples of magic tricks which have been perfected to such a degree that you wouldn’t believe me even if I explained how they’re performed, which is exactly what I do in this article.
David Blaine Makes Cards Disappear, Ushers In New World Order
Image Credit: gamisodes.com
David Blaine. You either know him as an underrated version of Jesus or the man who once held his breath for a month. Whatever category you dump him into, you can’t deny that David Blaine has made a unique name for himself. Many people in the magic community consider him weird, bizarre, and not even technically a magician. To which David subtly tells those people to fuck themselves. How does he do that? By performing a hideously difficult magic trick on live television.
If you clicked that link, you will see David Blaine ask Jimmy Kimmel to select a card. The name of the card will appear on the marker pen Jimmy is using. A random audience member will name a suit, and the deck which David is holding will condense in size until only the named suit remains, along with Jimmy’s original card. Pretty freaking cool. Pretty freaking difficult as shit.
The Possible Method
Any magician watching that video saw the cut and the pinky break David did near the start. Hell, even Jimmy joked about the card being forced on him. Some people probably noticed David fluff his words a little when talking to the audience member, and probably realised that quite a noticeable error was made. Regardless, the end result is still pretty spectacular. It takes serious balls to even attempt a sleight as complex as the one David does at the end in front of a live audience, not to mention on live TV.
Any magician watching that video saw the cut and the pinky break David did near the start. Hell, even Jimmy joked about the card being forced on him. Some people probably noticed David fluff his words a little when talking to the audience member, and probably realised that quite a noticeable error was made. Regardless, the end result is still pretty spectacular. It takes serious balls to even attempt a sleight as complex as the one David does at the end in front of a live audience, not to mention on live TV.
The Actual Method
It is obvious to anyone who is aware of David Blaine’s existence is that he is a sub-human Babylonian demon sent by the illuminati to usher in the next phase of the New World Order. This tweet pretty much proves it. Try explaining how ‘this nigga whole body leave the ground’ to your Nan and she what she says. The only explanation is that David Blaine invokes a sacrificial pact before each of his performances, resulting in the death of a lesser magician in order to further his own powers, whilst being high as balls throughout.
It is obvious to anyone who is aware of David Blaine’s existence is that he is a sub-human Babylonian demon sent by the illuminati to usher in the next phase of the New World Order. This tweet pretty much proves it. Try explaining how ‘this nigga whole body leave the ground’ to your Nan and she what she says. The only explanation is that David Blaine invokes a sacrificial pact before each of his performances, resulting in the death of a lesser magician in order to further his own powers, whilst being high as balls throughout.
Penn & Teller Create Clones Of Themselves, Shoot Them
Image Credit: drprem.com
Penn & Teller are the bad asses of magic. They are the only magicians to claim to have been kicked out of the magic castle for being too awesome. These days they may be more known for peddling more important things like atheism and bacon (snore), but they are still master magicians who perform constantly, and have pioneered one of the most impossible magic tricks of all time.
The bullet catch is old as fuck. It said to be one of the most dangerous stunts in the history of magic, rumoured to have killed at least six magicians. Fortunately, Penn & Teller are not two of those magicians. In fact, it would be incredibly unlikely for either of them to be killed during their performances as they oppose any form of dangerous activity in their shows at all. The bullet catch being no exception.
The Possible Method
Watch this. The magic community has been losing their shit for years regarding the method of P&T’s bullet catch. The only thing we can say for certain is that it’s as complicated as shit. We can also assume that at no point during the whole thing is either magician in any danger. Even if the whole trick went balls up, the most dangerous thing P&T would be dealing with would be a disappointed audience. There is a fuck ton of theories online regarding duplicated bullets, wax bullets, duplicated wax bullets, electronically-controlled exploding glass and most importantly, cloned versions of Penn & Teller with reinforced steel teeth.
Watch this. The magic community has been losing their shit for years regarding the method of P&T’s bullet catch. The only thing we can say for certain is that it’s as complicated as shit. We can also assume that at no point during the whole thing is either magician in any danger. Even if the whole trick went balls up, the most dangerous thing P&T would be dealing with would be a disappointed audience. There is a fuck ton of theories online regarding duplicated bullets, wax bullets, duplicated wax bullets, electronically-controlled exploding glass and most importantly, cloned versions of Penn & Teller with reinforced steel teeth.
The Actual Method
While researching the method for this trick I unknowingly stumbled upon this gem of information:
[German magician Ralf Bialla] wore bullet-proof glasses, strong gloves on his hands with which he covered parts of his face, and his front teeth were made of steel. He was seriously wounded nine times but survived. He died in 1975 after falling off a cliff.
Ironic deaths aside, this seems like the type of method P&T could modernise and improve. Which they did. By using clones. We’ve all seen The Prestige. P&T could never risk injuring themselves, they are one of the few reasons to visit Las Vegas besides strippers. What Penn & Teller have cleverly done is cloned themselves, then replaced their teeth with steel crowns. The type perfect for catching bullets. This makes perfect sense logically because it’s true that at no point are Penn and Teller in any danger. Their clones are.
While researching the method for this trick I unknowingly stumbled upon this gem of information:
[German magician Ralf Bialla] wore bullet-proof glasses, strong gloves on his hands with which he covered parts of his face, and his front teeth were made of steel. He was seriously wounded nine times but survived. He died in 1975 after falling off a cliff.
Ironic deaths aside, this seems like the type of method P&T could modernise and improve. Which they did. By using clones. We’ve all seen The Prestige. P&T could never risk injuring themselves, they are one of the few reasons to visit Las Vegas besides strippers. What Penn & Teller have cleverly done is cloned themselves, then replaced their teeth with steel crowns. The type perfect for catching bullets. This makes perfect sense logically because it’s true that at no point are Penn and Teller in any danger. Their clones are.
Criss Angel Tries To Walk On Water, Can’t
Image Credit: aetv.com
Saying that Criss Angel is universally loved and respected is like saying sex with an eighteen year old gymnast wouldn’t be awesome. The opposite is true on both occasions. There’s a lot of hate for Criss Angel in the magic community, whether it’s for extensive use of stooges, his irritating persona, or the biggest no-no in the magic industry, camera tricks.
TV magicians are a different breed than magicians who their coin by performing live. Magic TV series’ often involve a performer going out into the street and performing insane, impossible illusions for the general public. Derren Brown, Dynamo, David Blaine are all guilty of this. Even the master himself David Copperfield is considered be to the biggest abuser of camera tricks in the history of magic. But Copperfield, Blaine, Brown and Dynamo all have successful live tours to back up their skills. Limited use of stooges and camera tricks in TV performances are expected, given that it’s probably the producers’ ideas to fake illusions, not the magicians’. But there’s an obvious line between creative usage and outright abuse. Sprinkling some ‘impossibility’ in with ‘improbability’ creates a show full of ‘what ifs’ and ‘is that possible?’s’, and sometimes the answer is yes and sometimes no. In essence, the whole point of a magic show. Derren Brown can guess what you’re thinking on a TV show, and he can guess what you’re thinking on stage. Criss Angel tried to do the same with his live show, and failed.
The Possible Method
Paid stooges, camera trickery, quick edits, massive production budgets. None of the things which can help you in a live setting, hence the awful reviews. It looks like the only thing Criss Angel will make disappear is your money.
Paid stooges, camera trickery, quick edits, massive production budgets. None of the things which can help you in a live setting, hence the awful reviews. It looks like the only thing Criss Angel will make disappear is your money.
The Actual Method
Laziness.
Laziness.
Derren Brown Smokes, Looks Bad Ass
Image Credit: youtube.com/user/OfficialDerren
Dezza B isn’t recognised for his card magic. He’s known these days as either the best mentalist in the world or that guy that made your Nan rob an art gallery. But before mind-magic and pensioner heists became his thing, Derren was an incredibly skilled card manipulator. This marathon routine requires some of the most difficult sleights in existence, and the Derren’s misdirection skills in that video are world class. That isn’t a one-off either, watch here as Derren pulls cards out of thin air then ends by dissolving them into rose petals.
Enter Smoke. A visual trick in which a card is thought-of by a spectator, then guessed correctly by Derren. The card then removes itself from the deck and appears as a cigarette in Dez’s mouth. Classic.
The Possible Method
It is widely considered in the magic community that if a trick can be explained in a few words, then it’s a bad trick. A good magic trick’s explanation should be long winded and confusing, which Smoke is. It’s a combination of mentalism, suggestion, gaffed items, sleight of hand, luck, and good ol’ cigarettes.
It is widely considered in the magic community that if a trick can be explained in a few words, then it’s a bad trick. A good magic trick’s explanation should be long winded and confusing, which Smoke is. It’s a combination of mentalism, suggestion, gaffed items, sleight of hand, luck, and good ol’ cigarettes.
The Actual Method
I’m talking here about a man who predicted the lottery and then told you how he did it. A man who risked shooting himself in the head on television. A man who reads books for fun. I don’t think there’s any explanation which wouldn’t be anti-climatic. Regardless, the method is quite simple if you think about it, and I don’t just mean for Derren Brown’s Smoke. I mean for every trick on this list. In fact, maybe every magic trick in the world. And the answer is simple. If only we could take a few minutes to stop looking down at our mobile phones or updating our statuses. Maybe then we could all see the truth. I’ve already mentioned it once in this article, but you’ve forgotten about it. As is the beauty of magic and misdirection.
Ancient Satanic Illuminati Demons.
You're welcome, world.
I’m talking here about a man who predicted the lottery and then told you how he did it. A man who risked shooting himself in the head on television. A man who reads books for fun. I don’t think there’s any explanation which wouldn’t be anti-climatic. Regardless, the method is quite simple if you think about it, and I don’t just mean for Derren Brown’s Smoke. I mean for every trick on this list. In fact, maybe every magic trick in the world. And the answer is simple. If only we could take a few minutes to stop looking down at our mobile phones or updating our statuses. Maybe then we could all see the truth. I’ve already mentioned it once in this article, but you’ve forgotten about it. As is the beauty of magic and misdirection.
Ancient Satanic Illuminati Demons.
You're welcome, world.
By Joe Turner
Joe is one of the many writers we have at Foul Entertainment, known for Plenty Of Catfish. He is a main stay on the voice cast for Disagreevances. He's also responsible for the artistic design in our games.
Joe is one of the many writers we have at Foul Entertainment, known for Plenty Of Catfish. He is a main stay on the voice cast for Disagreevances. He's also responsible for the artistic design in our games.