Sources from a Johannesburg prison have today revealed that Oscar Pistorious has been getting drunk on prison bath-house booze and revealing a diferent side of his personality to fellow inmates. Rumours say that Oscar has been indulging in his drink of choice - Oscar's Bathroom Shots - and making a fool of himself in the communal showers. 

David Cameron today admitted that he was bombing Syria purely to necessitate the bombing of Syria.

"Look" Cameron said, while shifting his head to the side "I'm not bombing Syria because I want to, I'm bombing them because if I don't then I can't bomb Syria."

Hundreds of thousands of racists today liked a picture on Facebook of a caricature of what appears to be Al Jolson during his now accepted as incredibly racist black and white minstrel days. In a show of irony that most of them were completely unaware of they bombarded a picture that said this isn't racist, with racist comments. 

One user, known only as "Mikey Plums" said "vis is neva racist, and if any black cunt finks it is, i wil fite im in tha fevas"