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David Cameron Agrees to Create More Terrorists

2/12/2015

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David Cameron today admitted that he was bombing Syria purely to necessitate the bombing of Syria.

"Look" Cameron said, while shifting his head to the side "I'm not bombing Syria because I want to, I'm bombing them because if I don't then I can't bomb Syria."
"I know that it will likely galvanise the so called 'Islamic State' and possibly create more terrorists and maybe even lead to more terror attacks, probably on England. But let me tell you this, and I can't make this point strongly enough, if I don't bomb Syria, then how can I bomb Syria?"

The PMs comments come after his famous "I don't want to get rid of all the poor people, but if I don't take all of their money away from them, how can I get rid of them?" speech from the run up to the election. It's not known yet if his tactic of circular logic will convince parliament to sanction military action, but Cameron has one more speech to deliver.

"I know what you're all thinking, and yes, it is correct. I cannot bomb Syria without your support. But know this! If we don't bomb Syria, then how can we bomb Syria?"
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