Natwest Tell Business Account Holders To Suck It

The new CEO of Natwest Bank today told all of their business account holders to "suck it". Paul Levesque formerly of World Wrestling Entertainment Inc, made the bold statement on the day the bank confirmed plans to charge business account holders a fee to make deposits, making the accounts effectively negative interest, "Well-ah" Levesque started "I can-ah tell you all that you-ah need to start paying us to hold your money-ah. If you don't like it, I have two words for you. SUCK IT!" he finished while using his hands to chop the area where his genitals used to be before years of steroid abuse shrunk them beyond recognition.

Natwest business customer Bernard Twat told CNN "I just don't understand what is happening, I went in to the branch to see my manager about these new charges and Levesque was there. He took me into a back room and said he was going to shoot with me and then he told me that he saw me as a threat, and that was why he was burying me. Then he pretended to hit me with a sledgehammer and tried to force my 13 year old daughter to marry him."

Natwest's new COO, Sean Waltman, followed up on Levesque's statement by blacking up, waggling his tongue out of his mouth and repeating everything Levesque said verbatim while also doing a crotch chop.