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Helen Mirren Confirms Her Career Is At A New Low

18/6/2016

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After rumours have been dogging her for almost a year that her career was at an all time low, even worse than before she began acting, Helen Mirren today confirmed that they were indeed true and her career was as good as over when she confirmed she would be taking a role in the latest installment of The Fast And The Furious. 
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Talking to Variety Dame Mirren said "It's a great role, The Fast And The Furious films are a great example of modern pop culture appealing to a wide range of people, it's something I have been looking to do for a long time... oh who am I kidding, I'm skint. I spent all of my money on prostitutes and cocaine. I like to snort it off their cocks. Balls to bellend. This film is paying me $5 million, do you know how many lines I can do off gigolo dick for that? At the end of the day if Vin Diesel can do it sober, I can do it coked off my face."

Vin Diesel refused to comment on rumours claiming he had signed up for an escort agency.
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