God today revealed that he is gay to the world by flooding the home of a noted anti homosexual pastor. In a pre recorded piece of toast Jesus told an old lady in New Orleans "Dad, and me too because we are one and the same, has a new boyfriend. It's just started getting serious and He decided that it was time to teach everyone a lesson who has been slandering His lifestyle in His name. While He may be all knowing and all powerful He's not that inventive. So He flooded that prick."
Westboro Baptist Church member Shea Pish told FoulENT "I just don't get it, all these years God is self hating. I guess I gotta make sure I get into heaven so I can kick his faggot ass."
Westboro Baptist Church member Shea Pish told FoulENT "I just don't get it, all these years God is self hating. I guess I gotta make sure I get into heaven so I can kick his faggot ass."
Pastor Tony Perkins told assembled ducks and fish at his home "I know this means that everything I have ever said was complete bullshit based on me trying to legitismise my own prejudices through fables passed down from uneducated ancient goat herders, but to be completely honest with you I knew that anyway, hell when I was in college I sucked the odd dick, but then the college burned down and that just solidified my belief in a straight God, it turns out I was wrong, he is so so very gay. God doesn't hate fags, God is a fag!"
God: Yesterday
God's new boyfriend Dick told Gay Times "Actually God doesn't hate gay haters, he pities them. The flood was an accident, I was performing holy fellatio on him and I stuck a thumb right up that celestial asshole and it just shot out like a volcano all over that poor gay hating pastor and his family. God felt bad at first but then I told him, having a thumb up the ass doesn't make you a bottom and he was cool with it."
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