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Game Of Thrones Causes Deaths

30/6/2016

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Thousands of dribbling virgins today died after finding out something they were already pretty sure of about Game of Thrones. The well received show, which seems to have a crossover audience of non virgins, gave the reveal in the season six finale that George R R Martin had actually had sex with a woman. 
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The kind of shock that every single ridiculous fanboy experienced when they saw images of Martin going down on a bird, then slamming her for a minute or so and finally tipping his concrete on her lills, caused mass heart attacks to at least 3506 virgins who were watching the finale at the time. 

Survivor Asthma Sadtwat told us "I only just survived, it was only because I had just taken three puffs on my inhaler in the ad break because I knew something amazing was coming. I never thought it would be George."
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