The European and Russian space agencies announced plans to send a mission to the moon to assess its suitability for a settlement today. In a move which is guaranteed to cost an incredible amount of money at a time when food bank usage is at a record high all space agencies were heard to comment "fuck it, it's the moon!"
Image Credit: nineplanets.org
As the news broke to the world Vladimir Putin told a packed Kremlin "I am delighted to hear the news of the moon settlement, once it is completed we will have somewhere to send all of those faggots and Ukrainians"
The mission will attempt to find out if the moon has the natural resources to create fuel and food, which the world governments will then mine into oblivion, before going to war over who owns the moon and its resources.
The British parliament was not quite so bullish as David Cameron addressed the house saying "I am delighted to hear the news of the moon settlement, once it is completed we will have somewhere to send all of those homeless and poor, what do you mean the Ruskies already have dibs?"
Original news story: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-34504067
The mission will attempt to find out if the moon has the natural resources to create fuel and food, which the world governments will then mine into oblivion, before going to war over who owns the moon and its resources.
The British parliament was not quite so bullish as David Cameron addressed the house saying "I am delighted to hear the news of the moon settlement, once it is completed we will have somewhere to send all of those homeless and poor, what do you mean the Ruskies already have dibs?"
Original news story: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-34504067
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